Good afternoon! I am sitting here in Denver International Airport waiting for boarding to start so I can fly home. The return trip is going much smoother than the flight out yesterday.
Because I think I can teach you something, I’d like to present “MandoRon’s Guide to Missing a Flight but Still Getting on the Plane”.
Step 1 – Show up to the ticket counter 26 minutes before the flight and try to check-in. Turns out they won’t let you check-in under 30 minutes. It’s especially important to try and cram in as many things as possible before heading to the airport. Don’t concern yourself that it is a 7:00 a.m. flight. There is a plethora of things you can do before the sun comes up… just look at the army.
Step 2 – Here you have an option… you can either say “I’m feeling exceptionally lucky” and reserve a standby spot on the next flight or you can pay a $75 transfer fee to confirm a seat on the next flight. I went for option 2, so I can’t guarantee that standby will get you there. Proceed at your own risk.
Step 3 – Continue to proceed through security.
Step 4 – Rush to the gate and ask the nice man at the counter if there are any seats left on the flight. Show him your boarding pass and tell him that you’re on the next flight in two and a half hours. Don’t forget to thank him profusely when he lets you on board. This step is best executed with approximately 8 minutes until the plane leaves the gate.
If you’re wanting extra excitement, also leave your suitcase on the Hertz shuttle. It’s guaranteed to increase your heart rate and burn an extra 50 calories in a 10-minute period.
Bonus points are awarded for any OJ Simpson manuevers in the airport!
Needless to say, I arrived at the Denver two hours before my flight today…